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  • hazy

    Jun 07th • Posted in personal, travel

    It’s weird to think that in a couple months, I will be living in Oakland– starting a new life with a clean slate. The prospect of doing so simultaneously scares and excites me in a distinctly Holly Golightly fashion. I’ve been so accustomed to picking up and moving every couple of years that moving to the Bay Area seems like a natural progression. For those of you who were not already aware, I moved out of Chicago at the end of March (when I graduated) and ended up traversing Europe for a bit. Right now, I’m at home in Hawaii laying low before I pick up all my crap and move out to Oakland, where I will be attending a post-baccalaureate pre-medical program in the fall. And presumably, where I’ll be for the next couple of years as I transition into applying for medical school.

    Also, warning: This may, inevitably, be a post about me bitching about not living in a big city. I apologise in advance.

    Admittedly, I may or may not be stuck in a post-graduate haze. Graduating isn’t as fresh as it is for some of my peers (who have either recently graduated, or are about to graduate,) but it still feels odd. Being at home in Hawaii doesn’t help matters– the “Re-Roost” makes me feel disjointed and out of place. For the past couple of years, I have been living independently, with the freedom to basically live how I want, when I want, and I can do whatever I want. Living at home means I am back under my parents’ rules which aren’t awfully restricting (they basically leave me alone,) but provide a small inconvenience.

    The thing that I find even worse about living back at home in Hawaii is the fact that public transportation is horrible. You have to drive anywhere and everywhere to get around! Transitioning from a city with pretty solid public transportation is the worst for someone who refuses to drive! (Full disclosure: I rarely, if ever, drive because of an accident I got into, as well as the fact that I’ve basically conditioned myself to falling asleep whenever I get in a car. Watch me– it’s the craziest thing!) Living right by the metro station in Chicago was probably one of the things I most appreciated about my flat in Chicago. My commute to university involved crossing the street, and then taking the train two stops south. Buses were much easier to navigate in Chicago too; every major bus line is based off a major street, so I never had a problem. And if I was really ambitious (and if it was a nice day out)– Chicago is crazy walkable. Besides not being able to get around, I’ve found that Hawaii is more laid-back, chill, and therefore less exciting when it comes to entertainment. I may have been at an advantage in Chicago because I lived right by two major nightlife hubs (Wrigleyville and Boystown,) but still– Hawaii lacks when it comes to decent nightlife. And transportation also comes into play here because in Hawaii, you’ll need a DD, or else you need to call a cab (which is rare.) Essentially, I just miss the resources and life that living in a big city provides.

    I think I miss the social life the most. None of my friends live in Hawaii. And the ones that do are only here temporarily. Most of the friends I did retain after I graduated high school have slowly phased themselves out. I’ve become more adept to the art of long-distance friendships, and it’s a bit sad that the reality of adult friendships is that you can go years without seeing or talking to your friends. Perhaps this is just a stage we all go through. I don’t know- I’m sort of out of words. I miss my friends in Chicago the most. Despite the fact that I rarely saw them (save for a couple who I really saw because we lived so close to each other,) it was better to see them some of the time, rather than not at all.

    I guess I’ll feel differently once I move to the Bay, but Hawaii makes me feel restless. I’m hoping the feeling stops.